A Gentle Reminder About Boundaries
There is something about the “B” word that elicits fear and confusion for many. Fear around what other people might think about your boundary, confusion around how to create a boundary, and fear around how the boundary may land. This is often the case because boundaries are actually quite misunderstood.
Many people think boundaries are about others and control and demands on others. This is problematic and not what is going to keep you safe or protect you.
Here's what will...
Knowing naming and maintaining boundaries are essential to recovery and healthy relationships. Every relationship needs boundaries, including the relationship you have with yourself. Creating boundaries requires taking ownership over your voice and not allowing others to have the power to control it. Boundaries are about promoting expressions and intentions of how you plan to act or take care of yourself- expressing your needs and wants for a healthier, safer, authentic, honest you.
It’s not about the other person, it's about you.
We don't set boundaries expecting certain results, we set them to take care of ourselves. Learning to set healthy boundaries can feel uncomfortable at first but by creating healthy boundaries you create safety for healing and growth. Boundaries are actions that you take to separate from safe vs. unsafe. Be firmly grounded in what works for you and keep your attention there!
When you reach a point where you can honor your feelings and needs with a boundary you will not need to go big with rage and threats because you will embody a power within yourself that yields certainty of what you need. There is an enormous energetic difference between sharing your boundaries with a clear and calm state and doing so to control someone with unprocessed anger.
With that, even the person who betrayed you has a voice and choice toward your boundary- you may not trust their voice quite yet but you can set boundaries that are important to you.
How can Seen Therapy help?
If you are interested in learning more about Seen Therapy and how to deepen your connection to yourself and others contact us today for a free and confidential 15 minute consultation. Call: 1 800 607 7922 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.
***Seen Therapy provides individual, group, and intensive therapy for women seeking healthier connections and healthier lifestyles. Specializing in therapy for Mental Health challenges, Trauma/PTSD, Women’s Sexual Health and Intimacy difficulties, Betrayal Trauma, and Sex and Love Addiction***